Skip to content

People magazine and the National Enquirer are NOT a good summer reading list

Big Brother 2 has me completely in its thrall. God help me, I actually find Will charming, despite his evil tendencies. In the beginning, I thought Hardy was a doll, but now I’m finding myself rooting for Kent, as he truly seems more genuine. Hardy is just fooling himself. Hardy has convinced himself that he’s trying to help other more worthy people win the game, but in actuality, he will be doing this by bringing himself to the final three, at which point the voting is out of his hands. He could theorhetically then be voted in by the jury and never be morally held responsible for being evil.

I believe it’s in Isaiah: Woe to them who call evil good and good evil.

Don’t be impressed that I knew that’. It was in the epilogue to A Prayer For Owen Meany by John Irving. I’ve never even looked it up. I’m taking John’s word for it.

Speaking of John Irving, his newest book The Fourth Hand has an incredibly sexy woman (who is not traditionally beautiful but sexy just the same) who lives in Green Bay. I think this is a shout-out to moi, non? I’d like to know the story behind John Irving picking Green Bay as a setting. He describes our sad ‘riverside mall’ and the mountains of coal.

If he was actually here, scouting out information, I will likely kill myself. John Irving is my idol. John Irving is a literary god. That being said, ‘The Fourth Hand‘ is not so good. It’s ok. In fact, his last three books have been not that great, but his writing in ‘A Prayer For Owen Meany‘ earns him an eternal spot of honor in my heart on its own. His cumulative works (including ‘The Hotel New Hampshire‘ and ‘The Cider House Rules‘ are exceptional as well). Irving has been my favorite author since I was twelve and read ‘The World According to Garp‘.

And now that I’ve plugged John Irving, I feel as though I must plug T.C. Boyle (also known as T. Coraghesson Boyle). He is a fabulous writer, particularly of short stories. I highly recommend picking up ‘If The River Was Whiskey‘ or ‘Descent of Man‘ (both of which are short story collections) the next time you are at a big bookstore with a coffee shop in it. It disturbs me that I’m the only person that lists him as a favorite author in their profile. Maybe no one knows how to spell ‘Coraghesson’.

And if you haven’t yet read ‘A Prayer for Owen Meany‘, go read it, dammit. That’s your summer reading list. Oh, and also check out ‘A Handmaid’s Tale‘ by Margaret Atwood. Also a very good read. I purchased that book at the little book store up in Manitowish Waters and inhaled it in one afternoon. Now I always associate it with camping and summer, even though it’s not particular to either. But anyway, I have no doubt that you’ll love it as much as I do. Oh, and another recommendation for a fun summer read: ‘Microserfs‘ by Douglas Coupland.

Man, I just listed my favorites on my profile. I might as well make it a full house: Also read ‘Much Ado About Nothing‘ by William Shakespeare. If that’s too daunting (and it shouldn’t be, it’s not too tough people’ much lighter than, for instance, ‘Measure for Measure‘ or the weighty ‘Richard III‘), rent the Kenneth Branaugh movie instead and laugh at the sad performance of Keanu Reeves as Don John. The robotic Evil Ted in ‘Bill And Ted’s Bogus Journey’ had more versatility and emotion than his Don John portrayal.

There. Now go. And stop reading those damn Oprah books. Oh, except for Toni Morrison, who is acceptable, especially ‘The Bluest Eye‘. But Wally Lamb should burn in hell. Just so you know.


I should write more instead of reading everyone else’s stuff. I read that ‘Ellen Foster‘ thing that Oprah ended up putting on her list and it was SO pale and shallow, I could barely stand it. Some of the crap that’s getting published and lauded as being literary makes me ill. I should just go back to school and get my Ph.D in English and do something other than working technical support. My sister Mo (notice the use of the pseudonym there? Nice, huh Amy? —ooops) told me that I was too talented and should be doing something else.

Just go read your books. That is all.

One Trackback/Pingback

  1. Wendy Wimmer Dot Com › It’s gotta be the shoes on Monday, July 18, 2011 at 5:01 pm

    […] yes? Maybe once I get my degree, I can be a high-classed call girl. Smart Fat Girls Who Quote Margaret Atwood appeal to a very specialized client base, but one that is untapped. Note to self: run idea past the […]